A rich man was playing golf and made a clean sweep, the ball landing over in the midst of a bunch of horse-radish leaves.  He was busily engaged hunting his ball, when he pulled a leaf back and, to his amazement, there stood a Ford car which a party had driven to the golf links:  when they were ready to go home, they were unable to locate it.

A FABLE

     Ford Passenger:  "What is the name of the cemetery we are passing?"
     Ford Driver:  "That's not a cemetery, my dear boy, those are milestones."
          N. B.:  Please look at the headline.

THE REASON

     "I met a friend of yours to-day."
     "Who was it?"
     "Brown."
     "Don't mention Brown's name in my presence again.  I hate him."
     "Why, what did he do?"
     "He tried his hardest to keep me from buying a Ford."
     "Oh, but he didn't succeed."
     "No, that's why I hate him."