OBITUARY

     An Irishman, Dutchman and Jew died and they went to heaven in their autos.  First came the Jew.  St. Peter asked what make his car was and he replied, "A Buick."
     "You can't go in," said St. Peter.
     Next came the Dutchman and St Peter asked the make of his car.  He said his was an Overland.
     You can't go in," said St. Peter.
     "Last came the Irishman.  St. Peter asked him the make of his car and the Irishman replied, "A Ford."
     "Well," said St. Peter, "you can go in, for you've had your hell on earth."

CONUNDRUM

     Why did Caesar build a bridge across the Rhine?
     Because he was ashamed to use a "Ford."

*   *   *

     "What's the matter with Smith, has he got St. Vitus' Dance?"
     "No, that comes from running a Ford."